An IMAX cinematographer must have decided that his life is too tame because he built this Death Race 2000-esque vehicle for the purpose of driving into a tornado. Take luck.

In case you haven’t heard, a somewhat popular console/PC game called Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas has come under fire. Some extra content was found in the code and unlocked by a ‘hacker’. The extra bits involved the euphamism of ‘hot coffee’, because in the game as released, you can gain girlfriends around town and then they invite you in their house for coffee. Boom-chicka-wow-wow.

The ESRB today recalled the mature rating on GTA San Andreas and recommended it be relabelled AO (adults only) or pulled from stores until a new version is released, without the ‘objectionable’ content. Amazing what a little sex mini game will do, in this country. Violence to the nines? no problem! Simulated sex? OMG! Protect the kids!

Self-described hottie teacher who slept with student refuses plea deal because she’s too pretty for prison. Defense attorney spake,

To place an attractive young woman in that kind of hellhole, is like putting a piece of raw meat in with the lions.

Good luck with that… but then it is Florida.

It’s a widely held opinion in my line of work that people who work in Human Resources are dumb. With the exception of our friend who is “chewin’ bubblegum” in Maine, my experience has supported this opinion. Also suspect are the people that hire HR staff. From what I’ve seen, high hair trumps high IQ.

Exhibit A
At the organization where I work, our HR department consists of one person. And she’s a moron. Today she asked me a question about a program she uses because, as she said, “I heard you’re good at like computers and stuff.” Bear in mind that this program (ADP) is a payroll and administration application, so it’s designed for users that are not expected to be tech-savvy. Oh, and she’s the only person that uses it. Here’s our conversation verbatim (or as close to it as I can recall):

Her: “When I run the annual staff report in ADP it doesn’t show the new titles of the people who have been recently promoted; it still shows their old titles. Why?”
Me: “When did you change their titles in ADP?”
Her: “Do I actually have to do that?”
Me: “That is your job.”
Her: “I don’t mean keep track of that stuff, I mean enter it into ADP.”
Me: “I’m pretty sure that’s how you’re supposed to ‘keep track‘ of that data. How did you think it was going to get in there?”
Her: “I thought it would just know.”

Exhibit B
At a prior job, the director of HR mistakenly sent out an email to the entire staff of the company with this subject line:
“CONFIDENTIAL – Staff salaries, stock options, and bonuses”
It contained precisely that, plus social security numbers and birthdays. Everyone from the janitor to the CEO was on there. About an hour later she sent a followup:
“Please delete my previous CONFIDENTIAL email immediately!”
Idiot. That’s like putting yellow police tape around it. So for those few that hadn’t looked at the email by then, they did now. In more ways than one it was obvious that she was vastly overpaid. Ironically, she got a promotion a few weeks later. Justice prevailed a few months after that when the company folded.

Exhibit C
An acquaintance of mine is in the HR field. As diplomatically as possible I asked her if she was aware of the reputation her field has, and elicited her thoughts on the matter.
Her: “There is a perception that the job we do is not particularly difficult.”
Me: “Is it?”
Her (giggling): “No.”

Anyone else have other examples (or counterexamples, but the former are more fun to read)?

Overexcited Fox News reporter catches himself dividing beleaguered Londoners into “Arab” and “regular” people.

If you were thinking of buying a house, this should give you pause. From the AP article:

The Supreme Court on Thursday ruled that local governments may seize people’s homes and businesses — even against their will — for private economic development.

The 5-4 ruling represented a defeat for some Connecticut residents whose homes are slated for destruction to make room for an office complex. They argued that cities have no right to take their land except for projects with a clear public use, such as roads or schools, or to revitalize blighted areas.

As a result, cities now have wide power to bulldoze residences for projects such as shopping malls and hotel complexes in order to generate tax revenue.

First word: Sounds like “snoring”

CNN has a blurb on the new series Celebrity Charades. We caught a few minutes of it last night. Utter tripe. The only enjoyment we got out of it was from the opportunity to make fun of how poorly Robert Klein and Steve Guttenberg have aged. Oh and to give you good idea of the level of celebrity, one of the actors is best known for playing alongside Guttenberg as the Indian engineer in Short Circuit. I think we saw him at a wedding a few years ago.

I stumbled upon this (see how below). It’s a site promoting a book called Created to be His Help Meet, and it’s a manual for women on how to be obedient wives. The author categorizes men and based on that categorization, she explains the manner in which the wife should obey her husband. Here’s an excerpt from the “Command Man” chapter:

They are known for expecting their wives to wait on them hand and foot. A Command Man does not want his wife involved in any project that prevents her from serving him. If you are blessed to be married to a strong, forceful, bossy man, as I am, then it is very important for you learn how to make an appeal without challenging his authority. We will discuss how to make an appeal later in this book.

…A woman married to a Command Man has to earn her place in his heart by proving that she will stand by her man, faithful, loyal, and obedient. When she has won his confidence, he will treasure her to the extreme.

OK, good luck to you.

I don’t need to point out how asinine all of this is. What I want to is what the fuck is a “Help Meet?”